Difficulties which arise within families, can be deeply upsetting for everyone involved, this can include grandparents who may find themselves cut off from their grandchildren or caught in the middle of wider family tensions. In these situations, we at Wells Family Mediation can offer a constructive and supportive space to rebuild communication between parents and adult children and focus on the wellbeing of the grandchildren involved.
Family mediation is a voluntary process in which an independent, professionally trained mediator helps family members talk through disagreements and explore practical solutions together. As an alternative to escalating conflict which can happen through more formal legal proceedings, mediation provides a calm, neutral space where everyone has the opportunity to be heard. For grandparents, this can be especially valuable when relationships with adult children or former in-laws have broken down.
One of the key benefits of mediation is that it encourages cooperation rather than confrontation. Grandparents are often deeply involved and invested in maintaining a loving and stable relationship with their grandchildren, and mediation allows these concerns to be expressed openly and respectfully. Research shows that following family separation, the wider extended family can become more important than before in providing support, childcare and consistency.
Mediation can also be quicker, less stressful, and more cost-effective than going to court. Importantly, it gives families the flexibility to create arrangements that work for their particular circumstances, whether that involves regular visits, phone calls, or other forms of meaningful contact between grandparents and grandchildren.
While mediation does not guarantee that every dispute will be resolved immediately, it can open the door to healthier communication and more positive long-term relationships going forward. For grandparents seeking to remain an active and supportive presence in their grandchildren’s lives, family mediation can provide a compassionate and sensitive space for all involved in finding a path forward.
Today we want to acknowledge the important work published by the Family Solutions Group in their new report: “Putting Children First – the Evolving Role of the Family Law Professional.”
At Wells Family Mediation, we strongly support initiatives that focus on improving outcomes for children experiencing family separation, and this report sets out thoughtful and practical ideas to help achieve that.
We particularly welcome the recommendations being explored, including:
• The creation of a Commissioner for Separated Families
• Rethinking how family professionals work so that children’s welfare and voices remain central
• Reviewing how the concept of child welfare operates in law
• Encouraging professionals to share guidance from the Children’s Commissioner for England to help parents keep their child’s wellbeing at the heart of decisions during separation.
Creating a kinder, more humane approach to family separation will require collaboration across government, the family justice system, and professionals who support families every day.
We’re grateful to the Family Solutions Group for the work they have done to bring these ideas forward and to keep the focus where it belongs – on children.
30 years ago, I was asked to come and speak about family law to a local workshop for those struggling with separation and divorce. At the time, I was a partner in a London family law practice and was taking some time off following the birth of my first child. I arrived at the workshop feeling confident; I understood the law and could explain the factors which influence how children and finance issues are resolved following a separation.
I sat in the groups and listened to those present talk about their situations. The issues they faced had little to do with law. They were about loss, conflict, communication, fear, managing anger, boundaries, hurt, betrayal…. Overarching all of these was a deep wish to protect children and not leave them negatively affected by their parents splitting up. (Plus, for some, a very real sense of frustration with their ex and a strong wish for space and distance). As I listened, it became increasingly clear that the skills I had as a family lawyer could offer little to the needs of this group. I had no training beyond the application of law to a set of facts.
That evening set me on a different course, to broaden skills and work more holistically to learn from other professional disciplines. I realised that the ‘go-to’ professional for many should not be a person with legal skills so much as a person with relationship skills; a person who could help a parent to lay down the tug-of-war rope, and be willing to see things from their child’s perspective.
I could not be more thrilled to see the arrival of the Separated Parenting Programme Directory. These programmes are exactly the place to tackle these relationship challenges. They address one’s own feelings about the other parent, managing conflict, establishing healthy boundaries, the dynamics of good communication. They provide the toolkit for navigating separation in a way that protects children. The goal is to emerge with a strong and healthy family dynamic in separate homes.
This is one of the most exciting developments in a 30+ year career of working with separating families. As a mediator I say to all my clients it’s worth going on one of these programmes. Now we have a directory, they can easily find the right one for
them. I know they will benefit but much more importantly, this is just fantastic news for children.
To discover programmes designed to support parents and protect children through separation, visit…
Recent figures released by the Ministry of Justice show that 20,453 children were involved
in private family law cases, which took an average of 39 weeks to reach an outcome. That’s
around nine months of uncertainty for families and most importantly, for children.
These figures underline the importance of highlighting mediation as a practical alternative
to court. Court proceedings can often be lengthy, expensive and emotionally draining,
whereas through mediation many families are able to reach agreement long before a first
court hearing would even be listed, enabling them to move forward more quickly and with
less stress for the family.
In mediation, parents remain in control of their decisions. Rather than having arrangements
imposed by a court, families are supported to have open and balanced conversations and to
reach agreements that work best for them and their children. As mediators, our role is to
hold a safe and structured space, helping you communicate effectively, explore options, and
make informed decisions about the future.
When Mediation May Not Be Suitable
Mediation might not be suitable for every family. There are situations where the boundaries
and protections of the Court are not only necessary but essential for the safety and
wellbeing of children and parents. This is why the MIAM (Mediation Information and
Assessment Meeting) is such a vital first step. During a MIAM, a trained mediator will assess
whether mediation is appropriate and safe in your circumstances, and can help you
understand the next steps, whether through mediation or the court process.
For many families though, mediation can be a positive first step towards rebuilding
communication and creating workable, child-focused arrangements. We also provide
resources and information to support parents between sessions, encouraging reflective
thinking and collaboration.
Be among the first to receive the new policy and supporting resources.
What’s it all about?
Over half of teachers report being drawn into the challenges of parental separation. A new initiative from The Parents Promise offers practical policies and resources to support schools, parents, and pupils through separation.
Wells Family Mediation is hosting this free event to provide schools with the new policy and help them in their efforts to better support children’s learning and wellbeing.
“If we had a blank sheet of paper and were designing a package of support for a child whose parents are separating, that child’s school would of course play a fundamental role. By providing guidance and resources for teachers and parents alike, this Parents Promise initiative will make a real practical difference to the lives of children in the UK.” Sir Andrew McFarlane, President of the Family Division.
Who is it for?
Each school is invited to send up to two delegates, from their Senior
Leadership or Pastoral team. Places are limited and will be allocated
on a first come first served basis.
Speakers:
Helen Adam, Wells Family Mediation
James Hayhurst, The Parents Promise
Ellie Johnstone, Spurgeons
Special Guest:
David Osborne, Mayor of Tunbridge Wells
Where and When is it?
Date: Tuesday 11th November
Time: 3.30pm – 5:30pm (Registration &
refreshments from 3:30pm, prompt start at 4pm)
Location: The Royal Wells Hotel – 59 Mount Ephraim, Tunbridge Wells TN4 8BE
Brewin Dolphin are hosting a series of free, in-person workshops to provide women with practical advice, emotional support, and a safe space to connect with others who understand what you’re going through….
An invitation to women who are looking for support, information and community who are embarking on or already in the process of a divorce or separation.
We also welcome friends or family who have loved ones going through divorce and would like more information to support them through it.
Marriage can be incredibly hard. For those considering what life might be like separating or have concerns and questions having started that process, we are offering access to trained professionals who can steer you through the often emotional and difficult journey of the legal, financial, emotional, and practical impacts of separation.
We are hosting a series of free in person workshops to discuss the different elements of separation starting from how to discuss difficult topics with children, to money and life after separation.
At each session, brunch will be served while a panel of expert speakers discuss key topics in an intimate and safe environment with a small group of women.
Create your tribe and meet others who are considering, going through or perhaps coming out the other end of a separation. The aim of the series of events is to meet like-minded ladies, feel empowered by knowledge and reassured by the continued support of being part of a community.
DATE:
Tuesday 16th September 2025
VENUE:
The Deckhouse, 42-44 London Road, Blighs Meadow Shopping Centre, Sevenoaks, Kent TN13 1AS
TIMINGS:
10:30 – Arrival and meet the fellow guests
11:00 – Brunch and panel presentation starts
12:15 – Presentation ends, coffee and mingling
12:30 – Event closes
Session 1
The early stages: Should I stay, or should I go?
What should you be considering when making your decision
Mindfulness and grounding techniques to help with stress
Who do you need in your corner? Building your professional tribe
The road ahead – the process and available options such as Non-Court Dispute Resolution
Joanna Pratt Head of Family Thomson Snell & Passmore
Joanna helps clients with all aspects of family work including divorce, financial arrangements, pre and post nuptial agreements, cohabitee matters and arrangements for children. She has particular experience in advising on high-net-worth financial matters and financial and children’s cases with an international element.
Juliette Shaw Partner Wells Family Mediation
In her previous role as a family solicitor, Juliette specialised in a wide range of family law matters, including divorce and separation issues, property, finances, cohabitation disputes and all aspects of children matters. Having witnessed first-hand the benefits of mediation as a way of resolving family matters, Juliette trained as a mediator and has practised exclusively as a family mediator since 2017, working with clients in Tunbridge Wells and London. She is an accredited mediator with the Family Mediation Council.
Sarah Woodhouse Trauma Specialist Self-led Integration™.
Sarah is a trauma specialist, Coaching Psychologist, author and creator of Self-led Integration™. Dedicated to empowering you to break free from relational trauma and create real change in your life.
Louise Shaw Investment Director RBC Brewin Dolphin
Louise is passionate about helping women navigate their financial situation through divorce, from budgeting to working out what a settlement means for them in practical terms. Louise is committed to helping develop a focus on women’s wealth and investment knowledge.
Naomi Buff Founder Nourish by Naomi
Naomi is an Integrative Holistic Wellbeing Expert, specialising in helping women going through divorce, who are suffering with feeling overwhelmed with stress and anxiety through holistic modalities to get to the root of the issue and create life-long impactful and powerful change. Naomi’s practices include reiki, breathwork and mindset coaching to name a few.
Additional details
Please feel free to bring a plus one or to forward the invite to any ladies you think would benefit from joining the community.
Reserve your Space
Spaces are limited, so early booking is recommended.
As the new year begins, a peculiar term often resurfaces: ‘Divorce Month’. January has gained this reputation due to a perceived spike in divorce filings after the festive season. We’ve seen ‘Divorce Month’ and ‘Divorce Monday’ trending even more this year than last, and so at Wells Family Mediation, we thought we’d try to help unpack what it means for families navigating marital challenges, and to separate the myths from the facts.
Myth: Divorce Filings Peak on January 1st
While enquiries about divorce often rise in January, the idea that solicitor and mediators phone lines, and courts are flooded on the first week of January is exaggerated. The post-holiday period prompts reflection, leading to more enquiries, but filing for divorce is usually a careful and planned decision.
Fact: The Holidays Can Be a Tipping Point
The festive season often highlights family dynamics. Some couples delay decisions to “get through Christmas” for their children or extended family. Once January arrives, unresolved issues may lead to action.
Myth: January Divorces Are Inevitable
Not all couples facing the strain over Christmas choose to divorce. For some, January is a chance to work on their relationship. Counselling and professional support can help to address issues and strengthen bonds.
Fact: January Brings Increased Enquiries
Family law professionals and mediators often see a rise in enquiries in January. This reflects people seeking information to explore options, not a “divorce frenzy.” Many individuals are simply gathering facts and information.
What is ‘Divorce Monday’?
The first working Monday of January has earned the nickname Divorce Monday due to a notable increase in enquiries to legal professionals and mediators. After the Christmas break, this day often marks the start of serious exploration for individuals considering separation. For many, it’s about gathering information and seeking guidance rather than immediately filing for divorce.
How Mediation Can Help
If you’re contemplating separation or divorce, mediation offers a constructive alternative to litigation. Benefits include:
2 Preserving Relationships: For co-parents, mediation fosters co-operation, benefiting children and family dynamics.
3 Cost-Effectiveness: Mediation is often less expensive than court proceedings.
4 Customised Solutions: Mediators help craft agreements tailored to each family’s unique needs.
Starting the Year with Clarity
January can be a time of reflection and decision-making. Whether you’re working on your relationship, exploring separation, or seeking new co-parenting strategies, professional guidance is recommended. At Wells Family Mediation, we’re here to provide compassionate support and practical solutions.
January isn’t about “divorce”—it’s about making informed decisions, and we’re here to help you start the year with clarity and confidence.
