Child Inclusive Mediation

At Wells Family Mediation our focus is to put children’s rights and needs first. The UN Convention on the Rights of Children provides that children of a suitable age and understanding should be consulted when decisions are made which affect them.

When assisting parents to arrive at good decisions for their family arrangements, we offer an option where children of a suitable age meet with a specially trained mediator. Their views are then reported back to the parents at their next mediation appointment, to be taken into account in the mediation discussions and to assist any decision-making. This is called ‘Child Inclusive Mediation’.

Child Inclusive Mediation gives children of a suitable age the opportunity to express what’s important to them and their wishes for the future. It also reassures them that their parents are taking their views seriously, although it is made clear to them that they are not being given the power to make decisions; that responsibility rests with the parents.

Key points about talking to children in mediation:

  • Both parents must give their consent
  • Children do not have to attend if they don’t want to
  • Children are never expected to choose between parents and there is no language of ‘sides’. The context is that parents are working together in mediation to agree arrangements and it’s helpful for them to know any particular views that the child may have.
  • The mediator will specifically agree with a child what views may be fed back to the parents (and anything which they do not want to be passed back to the parents).
  • Children’s confidentiality is respected at all times. Unless a risk of harm is shown to exist, information passed by a child to the mediator in confidence will not be shared with anyone else.
  • The feedback is provided to the parents at a separate meeting

Child Inclusive Mediation offers children a neutral space to share their views, so their true desires can be taken into account when parents make decisions for them.

Many families have found this to be an invaluable process.

Throughout this whole horrible process we have both felt that the system is designed to leave us hating each other and to have had your support in helping us get to this point has meant a great deal, so thank you for your support of us both and for reflecting everything so well.

Thank you for all you have done to make a very sad and painful process somewhat less painful!

Thanks for all your help. We are talking a lot more and generally getting on much better, we even stood next to each other at rugby AND are going to parents’ evening together!

You did more in 4 hours than our lawyers had done in 1 year. For that I am very grateful.

I would like to thank you for the time you have spent in achieving in 4 hours, what we never achieved in 4 months. I think it is by far a much better process than solicitors and court.

I honestly feel that we now have a good chance of proceeding in an amicable way that hopefully in time will become a friendship with the children at its core. I do not think we would have achieved this through solicitors, and feel huge gratitude for your patience and gentleness.

It’s so much better to go through this process together in a calm and neutral setting, rather than being defensive at home or seeing a solicitor individually. You’ve been a great adviser on a tricky topic and the meetings were really productive.

If you would like to talk through your options or discuss the mediation process, call us on 01892 506906 or fill in the form below.

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